Happy New Year!

Now with Christmas behind us, a long week of no school and New Years arriving, I pause from shopping and wondering why there are no cookies left to reflect on the meaning of season. Joy to the world was a little hard to keep in mind as I hurtled from nth hour purchasing to appointments with the plumber, electrician and dryer repair guy and home in time for the school bus. I’ve never been so far behind for the holidays before, no cards, one batch of cookies, shopping, wrapping and decorating on Christmas Eve. Bring on the stress and guilt.

This past year was difficult for so many people with anxiety about the economy and what that meant; jobs, homes, income and the prospect of losing one or all. It’s easy to lose sight what is important, and perspective narrows to tunnel vision. I’m not an expert of any sort, but I’ve learned from past crisis that the essence of a family is keeping those you love safe and together, not the size of your house or number of possessions. Those are things and things can be replaced or done without. If your house was burning, what would you grab - the children or the stock certificates?

Once you have it in your mind that you CAN live without the stuff, it is remarkably freeing and peaceful, even if you are still surrounded by a mountain of plastic kiddy krap. Separating out what is important from the accessories allows you to see them for what they are. No one ever died from the lack of a flat screen, bluetooth, or designer clothes. A safe place to live, warm clothing, enough healthy food – that’s pretty much the essentials list. There are many people on this globe who can’t even lay claim those three, so I feel the blessings we have received in the luxury of wanting more…..but not really needing.

So my prescription for the New Year.

First, my tough love reminder - We don’t get that many days on this planet, don’t waste them whining or feeling sorry for yourself. As my mother often reminded me, “God helps those who help themselves.” And as I have learned, also those who know when to ask for help.

There is rarely “nothing” left. The best things in life come in all sizes of packages, and many are free to boot. It’s a cliché, but you only get to be a cliché by being obviously true.

There is an ever changing world outside your window, glorious and awe-full, better than any movie. The eternal cycle of rebirth enacted every year, from the first hint of green, the explosion of eye-popping spring bloom, the hum of insects lulling the warm air, gold and red tints overtaking the trees in a wave, the delicate tracing of ice on a window pane, and a deep plunge of white blanketing the still earth. Orchestras of tiny birds whistling in the trees or swooping overhead, a butterfly ballerina cavorting over a field, the deep smell of fresh earth, a hint of rain in the sultry summer air, the fragile taste of a snowflake landing on your tongue, contemplation of the infinite in the night sky - is all free of charge. You just have to stop and enjoy it. “Stop and smell the roses” is not just an expression, (and another too true cliché) but a way of life. Protecting the beauty and variety of that creation for the future is the responsibility laid on us in exchange for its delights.

Cheap is good too! Less meat, more veggies is good for your wallet and health. Walking ditto. Good for the planet too. Shop…sales, EBay and Craig’s list (not a paid announcement.)

You are surrounded by love and concern. Family and friends are there. Appreciate them even with their all too human imperfections. Keep remembering, “Let he or she who is without sin…..” (a very small and exclusive group of which I am not a member.) Be someone else’s angel, smile, give an unexpected compliment, a note or card just because.

Do what ever you can, and maybe a little more. A small sacrifice can make someone else’s life better. This year our Thanksgiving was about family and food, but also about giving; to the coat drive by the school district, supplying the local food pantry, volunteering. Many drops do fill the bucket.

Pray for those beyond the reach of your arms, in fear, danger, sickness, hunger, surrounded by darkness, real or perceived.

Count your blessings, especially those most amazing of gifts, children. They are a bequest, to you and to the future. Shower them with love and attention rather than riches, (plus education, home work checking, manners, and firm boundaries) and they will grow to be the kind of people you admire.

A happy and healthy New Year to all!

Christmas 2009

Lian's class holiday party. The kids performed several songs and then had treats and gifts.

The world's cutest elf!

An impromptu carol sing at church coffee hour. The risers were out for rehearsal of the pageant.

Caroling, caroling we will go. First stop was the nursing home where grandma is getting rehab. The residents loved to see the kids.

The group got bigger as we went on. Then we went to several homes to sing and finished up at the parish hall for hot chocolate and cookies. Then I went to work - the nativity figurines had to come out of storage in the attic above the church office, best accomplished out of business hours.

Saturday I went out for the Audubon Christmas Bird Count, a citizen science project that's been going on for over 100 years. It was in the 20's and my patrol is the shore line, just where the wind is whipping in. It was not a great day, 100 species were spotted, but with a blizzard on its way, many birds were hunkered down or fueling up at backyard feeders. The total numbers were up due to huge flocks of Greater Scaup out on the bays, over 20,000 birds. We did have some unusual sightings. Four lingering Great Egrets, way past their normal fall departure date. The snow started to fly about 2 so the Count ended early.

Then over Saturday night it really snowed, 1 foot of snow on the Sally meter. When I let Sally the dog out Sunday morning, the snow was up to her belly, 12". Lian likes to help shovel. Lela likes to eat snow with maple syrup and was out gathering several bowl fulls to store in the freezer.

The Christmas pageant was supposed to be on Sunday the 20th, but was nixed by the blizzard, so it joined the 5pm Family Xmas eve service. Lela and Lian were Silent Stars. It was a chaotic affair as rehearsal was 30 minutes before the pageant which had now been transposed from the parish hall to the church, and had to share quarters with the “Miracle of Christmas Orchestra” assembled from about anyone who can play an instrument – also with about 30 minutes of rehearsal. .

Lela led the stars down the aisle.

It was a wonderful, warm service, overflowing with kids, laughter and love.

There was also a visit from Santa after the service (once his suit and beard had been located.)

We had take out Chinese for Xmas dinner as putting on a meal was beyond my capacity at that point. Lela dragged out the evening by making gift drawings for Santa and insisting that we offer him left over take out as he might be sick of cookies by the time her got to our house, but was finally asleep about 9. Then Jamie and I wrapped until the wee hours. I got up at 4:30 and wrapped some more, including a trip up to Chris’s house to make sure Santa had done a good job.

The girls slept in until nearly 7. Stockings had overflowed onto the couch (Santa shops all year and sometimes forget that there is already a massive bag of stuff in the closet) Jamie and I finished wrapping family gifts and Christy brought Chris home for the day (she is in a rehab center recovering from a fall.) Then we got the dinner fixings together and finally arrived about 10:30am.

Organized handout of gifts went by the wayside and L & L ripped into the huge pile under the tree with glee.

Big hits were new dress up (Snow White for Lian, winter Belle for Lela) and cameras, REAL Canon (of course) cameras from Christy. We were all photographed many, many times.

The wreckage.


Dinner was ham under a volcanic coating of inspired left over cranberry glaze (1 bag of aging cranberries from the back of the crisper, an equally aged apple, cored, peeled, cut up, 1 clementine, grated rind and juice, about ? 1/2c brown sugar, juice from a can of pineapple, ginger, clove, mustard to taste, simmer until it’s thick paste. Squish the berries to make it smooth.) Sweet potatoes that failed to cook in the oven but were soft in under 2 minutes in the new super duper microwave, accompanied by green beans (because I forgot about the Brussels sprouts and fennel in the fridge), salad and finished off with pumpkin pie, Christy's apple cake and 3 kinds of ice cream. Eggnog ice cream and pumpkin pie is mum, mum good. Having had 3 hours of sleep I was ready for a nap.

This is our tree. It's a fake, obviously. It was left over from the church fair, and I thought, "well, the cats won't bother it and it's small, so lets try it." I didn't know you could get a Charlie Brown fake tree, but here it is.

December 2009

Just about finished. Whoo hoo it's taken me three days to get 2009 posted, but I'm going to get it all done before 2010, even if I have to stay up past my bedtime (8pm).

The run up to Xmas was a string of parties. First official holiday party was given by the Cleft team that operated on Lian. It's at the Children's Museum. The first Santa of the season too.

There are very cool climbing platforms, bubbles, a make it center with wood, nails, glue, fabric, lots of food, and lots of kids who look like Lian, including other adoptees.

The museum was featuring a Monkey King exhibit. Monkey King, for the unenlightened, is the most famous of all Chinese epics.

Two Monkey Kings! Will Heaven and earth survive?

No comment.

Sitting in the Buddha's hand.

Lian's school party. There was dancing, pizza, a visit by a Care Bear, Elmo, and Santa. But what they really liked was the face painting. We also found out who will be buying the raffle tickets from now on - Lian won 2 raffle prizes, a basket of toys and one of holiday treats.

And the "tattoos." Lela went for Cinderella. I didn't know until it was too late that the artist was using Sharpies. Yes, as in permanent markers. They do fade, in about a week or two.

Lian got Princess Belle, of Beauty and the Beast

The FCC Cookie exchange party with a visit by the big guy himself - with gifts so he must be the real one. I made the Armstrong family Scottish shortbread – the worlds simplest (and tastiest) cookie. 1c brown sugar, 4 c flour, 1 lb butter. Cream butter in mixer until fluffy, add sifted sugar, then about half the flour, turn out and keep kneading in flour until dough is stiff, (you might not use all the flour) roll out to about 1/8”, cut into small rounds (I use a cordial glass as a cutter) bake 8-12 minutes at 350. Take them out when they are still white and puffy. By the time they are golden they are over done, trust me on this. Gild the lily by adding ginger or lemon to the mix, or top with a sliced maraschino cherry or pecan.

We also squeezed in Family Movie Night at Lela’s school. We got to see Up on a fairly big screen in the cafetorium (their choice of word, not mine). They were selling the biggest and cheapest ($3) buckets of popcorn ever. The floor was a carpet of white by the time it was over.

November 2009

November launches with our church Fair, an all hands on deck affair, and major fundraiser. The courtyard has bouncy castle, petting zoo and pony rides. Lela is usually first in line.

Lian has now decided that ponies are OK, probably courtesy of "My Little Pony."

The toys and games room has something for everyone under the age of 10.

Downstairs is the Children's Carnival with games, prizes, snacks and face painting

A birthday party with FCC (Families with children from China) friends. I wonder of the non-Chinese kids notice they are in the minority?

Lian got her hair curled as part of the party make over. She loved it. When I went to buy a curling iron, all I could find was hair irons for straightening. I guess the girls are already fashionable.

Another birthday party with FCC friends. If the kids didn't have a social life we'd probably spend our weekends watching the dust bunnies multiplying.

We began to rumble inexorably toward Xmas with a brief pause to over eat on T-day. Chris (Jamie’s mom) had a fall and has been in rehab so visiting grandma became part of the routine.

Turkey Day was a bit fragmented. Jamie's mom, Chris, was still in the hospital (she's now close to getting released from rehab.) I was volunteering at our annual Turkey Trot 5 mile run (it benefits a local charity where I'm a board member.) We had the usual bird with trimmings, Christy did the bird, I did most of the trimmings, a bakery did the deserts, but apparently no pix to commemorate the day. So we went for a post Thanksgiving day jaunt that weekend. We tried to make it to the Bronx zoo but the traffic was too bad, (we spent an hour on the LI Snailway before giving it up as a bad deal) so we settled for the Queens zoo - which has a very nice carousel (are you noticing a theme to our jaunts?) Lela picks......the lion.

Me too, Lian's turn on the lion, but only if Papa goes with me.





Need I say anything more?

The zoo has added a nice bird migration themed play ground. This is crossing the Gulf of Mexico. Lela is Queen of the Monkey bars. Her personal record is four times back and forth before dropping. If she were a bird she'd be an Arctic Tern - they fly from one pole to the other. Most other kids are very impressed. The dads of little boys are generally green with envy. I overhear a lot of, "That little girl can do it...."

September October 2009

Back to school - actually the first day of real school for Lela, she's in kindergarten. She decided to be pretty in purple. After putting us through 3 months of anxiety and angst, she skipped onto the bus with barely a backward glance. She’s doing great, has made new friends and had a pretty perfect first report card. It seems like only yesterday that we were staggering groggily off a plane from China with a tiny baby girl. Where did the time go?

Lian's an old hand - she rode the bus to her speech intensive pre-k last year. September 16 marked Lian’s second Family Day. It’s amazing what she’s done in 2 short years; had major surgery, learned English, learned how to speak, and had to relearn what ever she had known in China, a lot of early concepts are very tied to language. She is one brave and amazing little girl, with a wicked sense of humor and a big heart. Lian is in her second year at her pre-k and loves her new class.

Between the late start (first full day wasn’t until the 14th and then with the Jewish holidays they had a light start to school and were able to ease into the routine, sort of. The routine involves blasting them out of bed at 6:30am as the first bus (Lian's) arrives at 7:35 and Lela's at 7:50.

Trying to get a family picture. This was the best of the lot, sigh.

Our church has a beach party to kick off the fall. It was a cool day,but everyone had fun.

Mum, fresh corn on the cob slathered in butter.

A Pines family reunion was organized by Cousin Beth. We arrived in two waves. We were the early birds for lunch and overlapped with the next crew for about an hour, time enough to do a group shot (guess who is Photoshopped into this one).

My Canadian cousins came for a visit, Elizabeth (formerly Buzzy) and Jane. We recycle names in our family as those are also my sisters' middle names, and Lian has an Elizabeth in the middle too.

But on to the main event. Halloween. Lela's school has a Halloween parade. The parents gather on the lawn side of the front parking lot and the kids walk along the lot from one end to the other. Pretty soon there is only a tiny lane as the paparazzi parents go in for their close ups. After vacillating wildly, Lela went for princess with a twist and decided to be Mulan of Chinese history and Disney fame. Thank heavens for Ebay, where I located her costume.

Halloween party at Lian's class. They are singing a song about a spider crawling up the leg, up the arm, up the head. Lian once again went for pink princess, Sleeping Beauty in the Disney color coding scheme, AKA Aurora, or Wohwa as Lian puts it.

The spider made it to Lian's cheek, eek!

The big day was on a Saturday, allowing for hours of trick or treating. We hit the road about 2 o'clock with friends and went around our neighborhood.

Pausing in the rounds for a sample break.

Look Ma, we've all got sucker colored tongues!

Pausing for a snack break with pal "Dorothy" at her grandma's house. Then they T or T'ed around that neighborhood. I swapped duty with Jamie and was back at the ranch handing out candy , so there are no pictures. Then they went on to Grandma Pines' neighborhood, finally wrapping up about 8pm. They could barely lift their bags of swag, which last well past Thanksgiving (suitably rationed) .