Lian Makes 4: March April 2011

Sunday, December 11, 2011

March April 2011

Fu Man Lela at Lian's birthday dinner

Lian's family birthday party

The ice cream cake. I'm getting better at it.

Friends Party

With big cousin Evan

All the Pines

Museum of Natural History NYC with cousin Oscar

Easter Vigel

Easter Family

In the violets

Spring has sprung.

March brought some thaws and Lian’s birthday, number 6. Chris had a fall and she was in rehab. So Lian’s first party was dinner at our favorite Chinese restaurant and presents at the nursing home with Grandma.

April was very busy. Lian’s friends party was early in the month, with dress up and ice cream cake. Since all they eat of regular cake is the icing, I have learned to make an ice cream cake – take 5 containers of whatever is on sale, a variety of mixing bowls and containers, lined with saran, layer it up, re-freeze, assemble with toothpicks and lots of whipped cream and sprinkles, re-organize the freezer to fit. April brought a visit from the Canadian Pines, Jamie’s brother Kirby and nephew Evan. We also had a visit from my sister Gillian and nephew Oscar, with a fun day trip to the Museum of Natural History. And Easter. We participated in all the services from the Great Vigil to the joyous Easter morning. And spring really arrived with a bloom. That’s when our micro-yard looks its best and I’m reminded that back when I did some gardening I put in lots and lots of bulbs, clever me.

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Welcome - The journey begins

This blog is about our extended journey to bring home our second daughter from China. Our first daughter, Lela, was adopted 1/25/05, five days after her first birthday, from Shaoguan, Guangdong with Children's Hope International through the non-special needs program, and is the delight of our lives.
Our journey to Lian began in late 2005, when we decided that we would like Lela to have a sibling. One of our friends from our first travel group had announced she was adopting a little boy through the China waiting child program.
We started looking at waiting child lists and researching special needs. We got files on a few children but either they were claimed by another family or had a need we didn't feel we could handle. Then in March 2006 - on the 28th to be exact, I got an e-mail that Marci needed a family for her first birthday from Children's House International. Marci was her nom de agency, they do not list children by their Chinese names. We had seen her picture online, a chubby cheeked cherub smiling at the camera, even though she had just had surgery for her cleft lip. The medical information was already 6 months old. Her special need was a unilateral cleft lip repaired at 3 months and unrepaired cleft palate. Her Chinese name was Han Lian. Han for the city where she lived (HanZhong) and also for the dominant ethnic group whose ancient empire was centered in Sha'anxi province. Lian is her personal name, meaning Lotus. While we tried to decide we also tried to secure new medical information, without success. Finally a gentle reminder from CHI that we either need to commit or let another family review the file.
On April 21, 2006, we sent in our Letter of intent (LOI.) We began working on our dossier - the massive accumulation of paperwork that you must complete for an adoption. We contacted Children's Hope, our agency for our first adoption, and they were willing to do our homestudy update. We got our criminal clearance forms and had check ups done. On June 16, 2006 we got the exciting news that we had been Pre-Approved (PA) by the Chinese Central Adoption Agency (CCAA.) We were going to be Lian's family!
(see post The Bad News First for what happened next)

Timeline

3/28/06 Lian's first birthday and the day we got her file
4/21/06 LOI We send in our Letter of Intent
6/16/06 PA We get pre-approval to adopt from China
(extremely long gap while we cope with 6 months of unemployment and then a 4 month hold up by the CIS)
1/3/07 I-117 petition to adopt an orphan sent to CIS
3/28/07 Lian turns two
4/28/07 CIS finally coughs up an approval
5/16/07 DTC Our dossier arrives in China
5/17/07 LID a world record for a log in date
6/?/07 Lian has palate surgery in HanZhong
7/11/07 We get an update
7/25/07 LOA Letter of Acceptence, a new wrinkle that adds 3 weeks to the wait time, wait day 70
7/27/07 We get our Chinese visas
8/5/07 LOA wait day 80
LOA 8/6/07, Day 81
8/10/07 500 days from 3/28/07
TA 8/23/07, only 19 days from LOA - and the LOA wasn't even received in China until 8/13
Leave for China 9/11/07
Family Day 9/16/06!!!!!!
CA 9/25/07
HOME!!!! 9/27/07

The China Waiting Child Program

How it works. Accredited adoption agencies are sent lists of children with various special needs, which prospective parents may view. A child's picture and biography are called a file. Unlike the regular program, there are as many little boys as girls. Common needs are cleft lip and palate, limb differences, congenital heart problems, or Hepatitis, ranging from minor to severe. Most of these children are healthy aside from their special need, and will grow up to lead productive, happy lives, if they have a loving family and access to the medical care they need.

Cleft Lip and Palate

Lian's special need is a unilateral cleft lip and palate. This is one of the most common birth defects, occurring in one in 700 births worldwide and one in 500 in Asian populations.
At about 4-8 weeks of gestation, the lip and palate fail to seam together - the indent between your lip and nose is your "cleft scar." There is no single cause. It can occur because of a vitamin deficiency or poisoning, environmental toxins, cramped positioning of the fetus, a failure of the blood supply, or a genetic predisposition. See http://www.widesmiles.org/ for lots more information.
In the US the baby’s lip is generally repaired between 3 and 6 months, as was Lian’s but the palate waits until about 1 year. Many children in orphanages and from poor family’s world-wide have their lips repaired thanks to charitable traveling surgical teams, but the palate may have to wait many years. http://www.smiletrain.org/site/PageServer The later the palate surgery the more difficulties with speech. Because Lian is in a special place run by Caring For China, she received her palate surgery before adoption. But she may still need speech therapy.
That doesn’t end the story. When permanent teeth come in between ages 6 and 8, a bone graft is done to allow the adult teeth to position correctly. A final surgery for the appearance of the nose and lip is done when the face is finished growing, about age 16.
Some Definitions.
Palate: The shape of the normal palate gives the proper tongue placement during speech. The palate is hard and boney from the gums to just past mid-point where the boney ridge gives way to soft tissue - the soft palate or velum. The soft palate goes beyond where you can feel it with your tongue and will reach all the way to the back of the throat. If you run your tongue along the middle of the hard palate, you can feel the line where the palate fused.
Lips: The face is formed out of three plates that move toward center during gestation. If they fuse normally, the place where they join forms the philitrim lines (the indent between your lips and nose).
Unilateral Cleft Lip: If one side fails to fuse it is a unilateral.
Bilateral Cleft Lip: If both sides fail to fuse.
Complete Cleft: A "complete cleft lip" is one that will separate the lip, all the way up through the floor of the nostril, and through the gum. A "complete cleft palate" will separate the palate all the way through the whole palatal structure.
Incomplete Cleft: An incomplete cleft of each will separate some, but not all of that particular structure.

Lian Makes 4

Sunday, December 11, 2011

March April 2011

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Mother's Day

Lian on left in yellow

Lian at 6 months

Lian at 4 months

Sha'anxi Province Map

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Our Family 9/16/07

A Family of three

Welcome - The journey begins

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Timeline

The China Waiting Child Program

Cleft Lip and Palate

The Weather in HanZhong

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Big Sister Lela

Lian's getting big

Caring For China

Children's House International Adoption Agency